I Guess I’m Dead

I had a dream last night that I was in an empty office-type area, I think on a college campus. Some people, strangers to me, came in and started talking with me, and pretty soon one of them said to me, “I think you’re dead.” Another one agreed, “Yeah, I don’t think you’re alive here. I think you are dead.” My dream self thought this was funny and kind of cool.

“OK,” I said, “I guess I’m dead. I’m leaving.” So I walked out of the office and off the campus. I was walking down sidewalks, past gas stations and other businesses, bemused with the idea that I was actually dead, at least in this reality where I found myself. I wasn’t upset at all, just having fun with the notion of walking around as a ghost of some sort.

Death has been on my mind lately. I have a friend who’s just my age (early 40s) who is dying of cancer. Yes, it’s upsetting and sad, but it also gets me thinking about what comes after this life.

I freely admit that I have no real clue, no hard facts, no more than any of us do. My personal sense, though, is that we are eternal, that our consciousness continues in some form. I suspect we have multiple lives, and the consciousness we know as ourselves here on Earth is only a small part of the picture. I like the notion of probable realities, and enjoy reading about quantum metaphysics. In my dream, it seemed like I was playing with some of these concepts: I was “dead,” but I was still conscious, still exploring my surroundings, still essentially myself.

Even if these are illusions, and nothing at all comes after, I’m okay with that. It’s the cycle of life, death, and rebirth, and it happens all the time. We eat other beings, whether plants or animals or both, in order to live. We take their lives to support ours, and in turn the waste, the compost, helps more life to grow. Matter is energy, and it cannot be destroyed, only transformed – one of the few ideas that both science and religion seem to agree upon. I don’t mind becoming a leaf on a tree, sand in a brook, or dirt on someone’s shoe. Everything is part of the all.

Probably on some levels of non-physical consciousness, I am already dead.

Yet here I am, enjoying a leisurely exploration of philosophical ideas late on a sunny Saturday morning. I feel the breeze coming in my window. I hear the birds singing, someone’s lawn mower running, and the occasional baas of the sheep next door. I smell the stargazer lilies in the front garden. I’m hungry, and pondering what I can rummage up for lunch. I feel open and joyful.

And in that sense, like you, I’m very much alive.


I Guess I’m Dead — 3 Comments

  1. AWESOMENESS! We have had a LOT of loved ones leave this experience in the last 9 months (5 beginning with my father last november and including my mothers best friend day before yesterday). My experiences with the other side have been very profound in increasing intensity, a snowball effect, if you will. I experienced first hand my grandmother’s final moments back in 1997 when she passed. and since Daddy left on November 7 the connection has been so very strong. With the unexpected passing of my mom’s friend Rose on July 31… it has brought other worldly issues right back into sharp focus (as if it had ever faded…lol) but even my mom has commented through her grief that each passing brings us closer to our own awareness.
    I also ponder the condensed nature of our recent losses. it seems so many are choosing to leave at this time. I sense major shifts on the horizon. <3

  2. you know, I’ve also been pondering this, as one who enjoys ‘interpreting’ dreams and has for many years. The idea of the college campus and office seem to me, to portray the societal acceptance of ‘norm’… thinking ‘inside the box’ being told what to think as opposed to knowing HOW to think. This is something I work with my son on a daily basis and sometimes even with myself in the unschooling process (reassessing what I REALLY feel is right and wrong in comparison to what I was trained to believe is right or wrong)… This is a beautiful dream from this perspective as in you have been marked as ‘dead’ to the ‘establishment’ which is an AWESOME compliment in the current way our society has created its reality.
    so again I say

  3. Thanks so much, Kimberlie, for your comments and insights. I love this: “each passing brings us closer to our own awareness.” Oooh, goosebumps…

    I love your interpretation. That makes so much sense with the work on myself I’ve been doing, and in that light, I love how my response in the dream was amusement and a matter-of-fact acceptance. I simply walked out and went on with my “life.” Nice!!!

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